July has been busy. Why, I can't really say. We have no family birthdays, no major holidays after the 1st. We have done no traveling. I have only done two shoots. And yet I find myself stretched to the limit.
My quest to finish editing the wedding photos went on hold last week as we had a minor medical crisis with my son. You know, he's been a fairly healthy kid. I've gone through the typical mom things. I've survived first colds, throwing up in public (ice hockey rink), throwing up in bed (ugh), week-long bugs that keep us all in our pyjamas. But I've also done two hospitalizations with him, both times for perioribital cellulitis, and there is always a niggling worry in the back of my mind that some underlying issue is causing that.
Two weekends agohe was exhausted. My nap-hating, rarely cranky kid was so, so tired. He complained of nothing else but tiredness. Too tired to eat, to play. He looked bad; pale, dull. On Tuesday morning of last week, my husband thought he looked thinner. Yup: three pounds off, which is a lot for a little body. He'd be laying on the couch within an hour of getting up. That same morning, he suddenly started asking for drinks more often. My husband noticed his breath smelled different. We both came to the same conclusion on our own: this could be potentially bad.
To the doctor we went. She shared our fears and sent him for bloodwork. And you know, by the following day, he seemed better, and I knew before the doctor even called that he did not have diabetes. But the scare took me out for the whole week, it seemed. (Turns out, it was some random virus. An eerie one at that.)
Aside from the early haze of post-partum anxiety and depression when I wondering what on earth I'd gotten myself into, I have to admit that the only times I've ever fleetingly wished I was not a parent have been in the midst of illness and the fear and anxiety that surround it. Why me? I'd moan dramatically, and my own issues with illness would be brought to the forefront, and I'd secretly seethe at the people who'd brought their sick kids to whatever event we were all attending, etc. But you know, why not me? We're no better than anyone else. Doesn't matter what we do - our child will get sick. Sometimes with very little, and sometimes more serious, like the times he's been hooked up to an IV for four days so he doesn't lose his sight.
So that, along with with my own illness treating me poorly (Crohn's disease), the two shoots I've done being big ones (wedding and a album cover shoot), I've been overextended. I have a couple of shoots coming up, including one wedding. Because of this, I have to say - I will not be accepting requests for photos from this point on until mid-September, and even then it'll be a limited amount. I just have too much on my plate, and I cannot spend my entire autumn at my computer, editing photos, however much it helps me learn.
And before I show this week's Project 52 photos (a letter of the alphabet was the theme; I chose S for sandals, splashing, and summer), I want to send my love to a couple of very special people in our life who have lost something precious. I cannot begin to fathom their heartache, for my own seems nearly unbearable and theirs is a thousand--a million--times worse. My love to you, S & A, and goodbye sweet Marty.
